Pam Gaskey

Nov 11, 2003

*turn to the better*

so i suddenly feel really good!! ahh.. it's real relief to not feel completely misanthropic.. even though i am still in the process of trying to completely recover.. but n e ways.. i just talked to nicole for about 5 minutes and she is as excited as me about going to see alkaline trio!! and she thinks Dane's name is cute which made me smile!! i'm listening to my second alkaline trio of the evening.. and it's making me sing and smile like nothing else!!!!!!!! yay!! i'm gonna blare one of these albums tomorrow before and after music so maybe Dane can hear and say something.. LA ur a genius!! i love you babe!!!! life will eventually work out for me, and i WILL find a decent guy.. i will survive nursing school.. i will meet A. Jay Popoff ;).. i will move to Cali.. i will have a happy, fulfilling life!!!!!!!!..

lyrical moment: <and i just can't see through the evidence, it's evident: it's right fucking there in black and white and red!!!!!!!!!>

Posted at 09:21 pm by Pam Gaskey
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Tuesday..

so here it is.. it's Tuesday evening and i'm attempting to read psychology before my exam on thursday.. this actually is quite and important task, seeing that if i get an A on this exam, at least with my extra experimentation points, i don't have to take the final!! which would be very amazing.. jenn and liz went out to smoke.. trish is out w/ jordan.. tarra is not here like usual.. so i once again have the quad to myself.. meaning that once again i am blaring Thursday War All The Time because, as you know, i am completely obsessed. i am very glad that i stayed home until this afternoon, studying yesterday and hitting the hay by 11, rather than being surrounded by dozens of high fellow dormmates.. i just don't get it.. the excitement of constant drinking and smoking.. not to mention how more people than not smoke cigarettes too.. it's so lame.. i mean, i can think of so countless sober activities to do.. laser tag.. bowling.. ice skating!!.. concerts!!!!!!!!!!!.. listening to cds.. movies.. chillling!.. driving around for no reason whatsoever.. girls' spa night.. i can keep going if you need me to.. everyone is going out to Delta Chi i guess thursday night. no thank you. i will stay here, study, and get rest for my 7:45 Exam!! i don't get it - a school night?? i rarely would even go to places like the mall on school nights, and the mall is closed by 9!!!! i hope that dane is a good boy - that's what i need.. i also need to hang out with lindsey/alli/elizabeth/rachel more - who i can have sober fun with.. i keep discovering more and more people who i think are all good who do this shit too.. it makes me angry.. and makes me feel alone.. i'm glad i have LA to talk to cuz it seems only she understands this mess.. I better get back to my reading/singing along to thursday.. later!!

Posted at 07:00 pm by Pam Gaskey
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Nov 7, 2003

Doing Well!!

Mood - Pretty good!!
Music - Thursday (what else??)

I'm in a good mood cuz it's 1:10, but I don't have to rush to get to bed cuz i already took a shower and did my hair, picked out clothes for tomorrow, and put on jewelry (yes i want to sleep as late as possible tomorrow, and still look somewhat cute!!!) I have all my stuff packed to go home at 12:55 since i have class from 7:45 till then.. 4 in a row.. then a well-deserved break from the rigors of college life!! I get to see my mommy, daddy, brother, and best friend Leigh Ann! yay!! =) Girls Night Tomorrow night!!!! and my brother got me the new SoCo CD!!!!!! I realized I haul way too much crap back and forth when i go home - i have a suitcase full of dirty laundry, a messenger bag full of School work/books to study, a backpack with hairdryer, shoes, makeup, etc, my laptop, and my huge CD bag.. that's 5 things i have to carry!! and i don't even have room for my sheets!! i guess i'll just wash those here or something - or next weekend.. I GET TO DRIVE MY CAR IN ABOUT 13 HOURS!!!!!!!! this is great!! I hate all the people on CDNOW.COM who say that the new Thursday CD is shit.. and that Full Collapse is better.. cuz they are wrong and they suck majorly!! I am still Completely obsessed with it and it is absolutely amazing - the lyrics, the incredibly difficult music, the passion, the diversity, and even geoff's voice!! I am completely enthralled in listening right now - sorry for that unnecessary burst of energy!! but it was burning to get out!!! haha.. well.. to bed i go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NIGHTY NIGHT!!!

Posted at 01:16 am by Pam Gaskey
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Nov 5, 2003

obsessions suck..

Well.. i only had one class today and it was relaxing.. Understanding Music, so all we did was listen to pieces from the Romantic Era.. and I stared at Dane.. whoops!!! haha.. anyways.. i had to go to a psychology experiment that i signed up for at 12.. just 10 minutes after UM ended so i had to rush.. but it was all good cuz i had Thursday streaming through my headphones!!! oh yeah! Now here i am.. feeding my hunger for Lit and Hansome Devil.. more obsessions.. grr! last night i was having sick feelings when thinking about how i still really like mike after 4 1/2 years and i can't make it stop! Just like I have to listen to Thurday at least 4 times a day to feel good right now.. And i'm really confused, cuz i might have to preorder the HD cd online, cuz it might not be distributed to stores??? and Lit is putting out a new CD in spring.. on a label yet to be announced.. and in the future they may only have new songs available online?? and A.Jay DOES have a daughter.. Presley.. Presley Popoff. that sounds funny... and I LA is dealing with all this shit from chris.. guys are such ass holes.. she deserves much better! i wish there was something i could do.. right now i'm so tired but i dont want to take a nap!! i have shit to do today still- voter registration drive for KIC from 4-5, then SPN from 5-6 - that is if i decide to go.. BLAH!! that's how i feel today.. i can't wait to go home and see my best friend and hang out, and see my brother, and my mom and dad, and everyone at work, and whoever else i happen to run into! it's a much needed break from the stresses in my life and a break from my sleep deprivation. i hope the next 2 days go smoothly.. i don't need any more stress.. BLAH!!

Posted at 01:49 pm by Pam Gaskey
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Perplexed Pam..

so today was a long day.. structure at 7:45.. breakfast @ Eastway w/ Shelley.. 2 hour nap - sleeping through Chemistry.. Psychology at 12:15.. Structure Lab at 2:15.. Dinner @ 4 w/ Liz, Jenn, Jerad, Vince, Shawn and Michelle.. KIC from 7-9:30.... I think I listened to the Thursday CD 5 complete times over the course of the day - even though I haven't really been in my room all that much.. Oh well, I am completely obsessed.. seriously.. if you haven't bought War All The Time yet, I HIGHLY recommend it!! haha.. I also passed my boredom starting this blog site thingamabob, reading Choke by Chuck Palahniuk, flipping through the Nov. issue of AP, talking to my bestest buddy Leigh Ann, lookin at Mike's new site... CUZ I TOTALLY SUCK!!!! I SUCK I SUCK I SUCK I SUCK.. until the end of time - but it's ok.. cuz i have a new potential.. well, probably not.. but it's the mysterious punk boy in my music class - Dane - and he is so damn cute!!! lol... lookin forward to Girls Night on Friday and gettin some Real Sleep.. ahh.. what a alife!!! bye for now

Posted at 12:28 am by Pam Gaskey
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